Things Books Taught Me11:01 AM
A very, very serious post.
I read a lot. Needless to say, you don't read a lot of books without learning a few things. Heck, books are the very best source of knowledge! I've picked up some useful advice over the years, and I'm here to pass some of that amazing knowledge on to all of you.
The Hunger Games taught me that food is the most important thing, ever, and you should always focus on that and nothing else. This is science.
The Scorpio Races taught me that Sean Kendrick is the solution to all problems.
The Maze Runner taught me that it's probably a good idea to start jogging now, otherwise you're screwed when the apocalypse rolls around. (Also, you're screwed if you're a teenager. Who else would the evil government pick to mess around with and then use to their advantage? Someone more responsible and capable? Pssh.)
The Lunar Chronicles taught me that everyone gets an attractive love interest. EVERYONEEEE. This gives me hope for the future.
Les Miserables taught me to leave that bread alone. Just. Leave it. Don't even bother. It's not worth it.
Lemony Snicket taught me that people who don't read are very dangerous and should be avoided at all costs, and books are your best friends. Also, hoard all sugar bowls you come across. Who knows why, but it's important anyway.
Vicious taught me to NEVER TRUST ANYONE AND GET USED TO BEING SCARRED FOR LIFE.
Unwind taught me that "nice socks" is not, under any circumstances, a compliment. (also, your life is never as bad as it could be. At least you have all your limbs and stuff.)
The Great Gatsby taught me that parties suck, and I'm not as angsty as I think I am.
What have books taught you?